Lame?

The LORD has put me in position to see the brokenness of others. To see their hopelessness. I can feel their burden souls. My heart breaks for them. I just want to wipe away tears and make it all better. These are the moments heartbreak has been allowed into my life. Without heartbreak, disappointment, fear, pain, hopelessness and trials of faith, I would not have a Heart like HIS. Nor would my words be ought by theory. I praise Jesus for being KING.

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There are several special ones I am praying for this week intensely. Repentance is at the forefront of my mind, discovering ever more areas in my own life in need of agreement with the Almighty Creator King. Serving in prayer is serious business.

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The lame man looked at them eagerly, expecting some money. But Peter said, "I don't have any silver or gold for you. But I'll give you what I have. In the name of Jesus Christ the Nazarene, get up and walk!" Then Peter took the lame man by the right hand and helped him up. And as he did, the man's feet and ankles were instantly healed and strengthened. Acts 3:5-7

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Lame? How many forms that can take. I've been a lame Christian and have been prayed for and taken by the hand to get up and walk! The Christian Walk is filled with danger and adventure. It isn't boring or empty. The Lord desires all of us and fulfils all of us. Even flawed Peter, even flawed me can give hope, faith and love. In the name of Jesus, by His power and for His Glory I'm lifting to the throne of grace, mercy, redemption and salvation the lame walkers of faith crying out for help. May their feet and ankles be strengthened and healed.....standing them in the Promised Land.

He Delights In Me

They attacked me at a moment when I was in distress,

but the LORD supported me.

He led me to a place of safety;

he rescued me because he delights in me.

The LORD rewarded me for doing right;

he restored me because of my innocence.

Psalm 18:18-20

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Isn't it just the time to be attacked when we are at our weakest. For me it is. The enemy is watching for perfect timing to arrest my faith. Holding on to truth under attack is not easy as flames of persecution singe my hair. I wanna have the faith to walk into the furnace and come out without stinking of smoke! Fire Walker isn't a name I can go by. Fear of being burned is more reality. Fear being the opposite of faith rings bells of alarm in my mind.

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I am stunned by the support the LORD gives under attack. Sometimes my soul floats, other times I can't hear or feel him at all. Holding on to the truth of his Word is a discipline and lifeline. He is utterly my hero during the trials he swoops in to save me. I wish it was that easy all the time. He only shows off like that enough to restore my faith. I've come to realize He doesn't want such a one sided love affair. Ya I love it when HE loves me, comes to my rescue, restores, saves, protects and lifts. But that is him delighting in me. Where does that reveal my delight in HIM? Do I? Do I really? I ask myself, "Do I run to Him just for Him? Would I love Him despite a love for or not for me? Do I want to delight in Him above all?" How different my life would be. How different...yet it is what I want. But am not. I still struggle with delighting in compartmentalizing....many delights, so to speak. Yes, He is my filter. I do believe Him. He is truth. So what's up? Could it be the deference between loving Jesus and being so in-love that it eclipses all else. Could it be the real jump into another existence. Is this what Paul experienced? Peace that passes understanding? The joy of the LORD?

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The LORD directs the steps of the godly. He delights in every detail of their lives.

Psalm 37:4

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Take delight in the LORD, and he will give you your heart's desires.

Psalm 37:4

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He knows my name...as the song goes. The next lyrics should be, he knows my desires! I think, I know them and so beg/pray for them. Another thread to be pulled from the fabric of my flesh is that of trusting my "known" desires. As crazy as it sounds, that is believing God. My life is a complete statement of Him not giving me my requested desires and giving me the real desires of my heart. Those desires I didn't even know existed or wanted. In the movies, I remember a line, "you are everything, I never knew, I always wanted." True that. He knows me in a way I can never know myself. Loves me, still.

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For your royal husband delights in your beauty; honor him, for he is your lord.

Psalm 45:11

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Praise the LORD!

I will thank the LORD with all my heart

as I meet with his godly people.

How amazing are the deeds of the LORD!

All who delight in him should ponder them.

Everything he does reveals his glory and majesty.

His righteousness never fails.

Psalm 111:1-3

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May HE, THE ONE AND ONLY, be the DELIGHT of our LIVES!!!

What About Me?

If God gives such attention to the appearance of wildflowers - most of which are never even seen - don't you think he'll attend to you, take pride in you, do his best for you? What I'm trying to do here is to get you to relax, to not be so preoccupied with getting, so you can respond to God's giving. People who don't know God and the way he works fuss over these things, but you know both God and how he works. Steep your life in God-reality, God-initiative, God-provisions. Don't worry about missing out. You'll find all your everyday human concerns will be met. Matthew 6:30 The Message

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I've read that verse many times and applied it to material possessions and to physical needs. As I see it here in The Message I find that I'm fed in a different way.

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Attention. What a word. It's a command! My heart screams at times for attention. Even little girls desire attention. How have I not grown up? This passage is telling me not to fuss. God knows I fuss about attention and missing out. He says it is an everyday human concern. That makes me feel a little better. My need for attention is an everyday human concern. So it is going to be there, I can't just make it go away, suppress it, ignore it, or even walk away from it. It does not mean that I am selfish, self-centered or self-absorbed. It means that the way I am created I have a deep need for attention. What I fill that with or how I doctor that need is something else. Forcing someone else to meet my attention needs is selfish and self-absorbed, blinding me to their needs and desires: Completely ignoring Jesus and devaluing His relationship with me. It painfully reveals my lack of seeking the Lord's attention, or giving Him mine.jjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj

I don't struggle with attention in every area of my life....but where I do, it is destructive and demanding. I struggle with attention that I feel slips away from me if I don't make an issue of it. I simply do not trust God. OUCH. Oh, I don't say that or even think it in the moments of fussing. Yet the reality of convicting truth shatters any allusion I may try to cling to.

You know God and how HE works: I do...reality, initiative, provision

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Attend to me

Take pride in me

Do what's best for me

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RELAX, don't be preoccupied with getting attention - so I can RESPOND to God's GIVING

(stop the fussing, the worshiping/focus directing thoughts and actions)

Preoccupied.............(WHAT??!) God is saying I am setting out to be a fussy, demanding person. That before I am occupied I've set my heart and thoughts. I am looking for ways to be disappointed (WHAT???!) That can't be me! Am I really looking for it? Do I really take everything through THAT UGLY filter? Let me soften the blow to my heart......it is a small part of me....Ya, I can't quite swallow that either. Even a small amount is damaging and it's impact has the ability to reach further than I can control or desire.

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So here's what I want you to do, God helping you: Take your everyday, ordinary life - your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around life - and place it before God as an offering. Embracing what God does for you is the best thing you can do for him. Don't become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You'll be changed from the inside out. Readily recognize what he wants from you, and quickly respond to it. Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down to its level of immaturity, God brings the best out of you, develops well-formed maturity in you. Romans 12:1 The Message

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Do I trust God? Is Jesus my heart and longing? Is HE the one I am seeking/worshiping/focusing to direct my thoughts and actions? Is HE? Yes and no. So the question really is, Is He enough? I sing the song lyrics...I mean them with my whole heart....but it slips away as I look else where to fill my need of attention. A crack in the armor has been found. The protective gear over my heart has slipped. Maybe I forgot to strap it on firmly? Maybe I forget my brain covering in moments.

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I LOVE YOU LORD!

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Be good to your servant, God; be as good as your Word. Train me in good common sense; I'm thoroughly committed to living your way. Before I learned to answer you, I wandered all over the place, but now I'm in step with your Word. You are good, and the source of good; train me in your goodness. The godless spread lies about me, but I focus my attention on what you are saying; They're bland as a bucket of lard, while I dance to the tune of your revelation. My troubles turned out all for the best - they forced me to learn from your textbook. Truth from your mouth means more to me than striking it rich in a gold mine. Psalm 119:65 The Message

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So, it's a new day. I'm going to learn from the truth spoken from my lips to the children, "Fussing will never get what you what." As God parents me saying to my heart, "I can't bless fussing my love." I will give my attention to Jesus and be ready to respond to the attention He gives me. In fact....now I am really EXCITED!

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This WILDFLOWER is ready to be Dressed by the KING JESUS!!!

Rejoice in the LORD! Again I say REJOICE!!!

How do I find the words to express my heart watching my son baptize my daughter? God keeps HIS promises!

I know my children, and know their flaws just like the Lord knows me. I LOVE them. I am in love with them. By giving my heart, by living the sacrifice for them, I discover layers of Jesus love and sacrifice for me. HE LOVES me, He is in love with me. Love is defined by sacrifice. Such a mystery confusing me for years. In fact I think I was stuck on that point, defending my position, as if God would concede. Talk about sassy adolescent type.

Little Mommy desired Bubba to baptize her. Despite all the disciplining from myself and others, it is her brother that made it real. It became real for her in joint Bible studies, in their relationship, in his struggles, in his victories, in his witness. From us adults, it was theory and teaching. But from Bubba, it was real.....transparent...life. She saw in him God is real and true for everyone.

Entering the water, the beginning of new life.....she marries Jesus for life. Her first husband. She has made covenant with Him. Our family celebrated by making her new clothes for the bride.

Be kindly affectionate to one another with brotherly love, in honor giving preference to one another; Romans 12:10kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk

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Therefore let us not judge one another anymore, but rather resolve this, not to put a stumbling block or a cause to fall in our brother's way. Romans 14:13

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But concerning brotherly love you have no need that I should write to you, for you yourselves are taught by God to love one another; 1 Thessalonians 4:9

Let brotherly love continue. Hebrews 13:1

Finally, all of you be of one mind, having compassion for one another; love as brothers, be tenderhearted, be courteous; not returning evil for evil or reviling for reviling, but on the contrary blessing, knowing that you were called to this, that you may inherit a blessing. I Peter 3:8-9

But also for this very reason, giving all diligence, add to your faith virtue, to virtue knowledge, to knowledge self-control, to self-control perseverance, to perseverance godliness, to godliness brotherly kindness, and to brotherly kindness love. For if these things are yours and abound, you will be neither barren nor unfruitful in the knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ.

2 Peter 1:5-8

He who loves his brother abides in the light, and there is no cause for stumbling in him.

1 John 2:10

The miracle of our family keeps unfolding... PRAISE JESUS!!!!

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Turning the Page

So much, it seems fills my life. Challenges, CHALLENGES. I ask myself, "What is the LORD thinking?" Through it all, He is always there and providing whatever I've needed to complete a task He's asked of me. I've been WAY over my head. Let me witness, Jesus IS ALIVE!

It has been hard being a Christian at times. The contrast without Christ is vivid. There is no other hope. This has been a season of living persecution. Ya don't have to go to another country. I'm finding things look clearer, my vision desperate for the LORD. My love for HIS WORD like that of the Psalms.

Despite or maybe because of the past year we are all stronger. I feel completely worn out physically and emotionally, letting me truly see/understand/know/recognize i am weak. BUT HE IS STRONG!!!!

There is an awful few minutes turned glorious by the power of the HOLY SPIRIT seared in my mind. I know this as I was something I'm not, restrained as I am not, calm as I am not........I left reeling from the encounter, drained, overwhelmed.......until the realization of His Strength and Presence dawned like the sun on the horizon. It's not everyday I get to see HIM take over this body, this mouth. I'm so glad to have had the bit in my mouth and not operating with a mind of flesh. Victory. The kind of victory my soul desires above what victory looks like to the flesh. The most amazing thing about my LORD that day is He just carried me.....there was no battle with my flesh and spirit. I wish I could say I continued to walk in step with His Spirit, I can't. But I do know the joy of it and long to make it more of my life. Unexpected, just like the flood.

Indeed, we put bits in horses' mouths that they may obey us, and we turn their whole body.

James 3:3

That which is born of the flesh is flesh, and that which is born of the Spirit is spirit.

John 3:6

It is the Spirit who gives life; the flesh profits nothing. The words that I speak to you are spirit, and the are life.

John 6:63

For those who live according to the flesh set their minds on the things of the flesh, but those who live according to the Spirit, the things of the Spirit.

Romans 8:5

For if you live according to the flesh you will die; but it by the Spirit you put to death the deeds of the body, you will live.

Romans 8:13

I say then: Walk in the Spirit, and you shall not fulfill the lust of the flesh.

Galatians 5:16

For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual host of wickedness in the heavenly places.

Ephesians 6:12

So I'm turning the page of self reliance once again to the page of Jesus where I depend of His Faithfulness, His Authority and His Promises. Challenges still surround me, yet they belong to Him. I am His servant. May all the glory go to the KING of Heaven!

The New Deal

I am a new creation in Christ....So I need to, stop it! I need to do it! I need to live it. What is my freedom for anyway?
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Teaching is sure revealing to the teacher. Needing to break concepts down for little ones, I find myself being the one taught.
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Today, fresh to my spirit, once again, the heart of servant hood. My daughter, Little Mommy, at eight, ranting under her breath, "All you want is for me to be a servant, 'round here!" My reply to her grumbles, "Yes, that's exactly right." "WHAT", she wailed.
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Isn't that just it. We really don't want to serve. Sure, I love to put on some serve time. Love to take it off too. Live it in each moment? What about me, my time? Who's gonna be there for me? I'm tired. It's someone else's turn. I'm always the servant. More sad to say, is that my personal litany doesn't end here. It is so nasty, like trash in my heart. Daughter, is only showing what is in my heart at times. If I dare see truth. Will I turn from truth? Will I allow truth to free me? Or will I simply walk by it, compromised to chains? Chains sucking life out of me and others.
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Truth. The truth as I shared with my young disciple is that we are designed to serve. We will serve. Nothing can stop or prevent it. Our choice is to who or what will our service go. Our only hope is Jesus. The default is fantastically horrible and deceiving, like in so many things. Focus and desire must be on what matters. If we fail to discipline our thoughts and heart to this everyday, over and over again choosing to serve Jesus.........we simply won't. It doesn't seem fair. Everyone one wants a one time choice. Servant of the King pursues daily. That's who he or she simply is. Servant of the KING.
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Lazy or Trustworthy. These are the opposing ideas presented this week. To grow in becoming a reliable woman of God.
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"Lazy people irritate their employers, like vinegar to the teeth or smoke in the eyes." Proverbs 10:26
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"Trustworthy messengers refresh like snow in summer they revive the spirit of their employer." Proverbs 25:13
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We put vinegar on her teeth, that was a life lesson to be remembered and she recently had smoke in her eyes. Coming in to the air conditioner for a drink of water on a hot summer day is something she is familiar with. She doesn't want that kind of negative affect on others. Neither do I. The chance to participate with the LORD as water...WOW. How awesome is that. We both want that. Servant, has a different sound in the light. Could this also mean we have the ability to taste like vinegar or water to the LORD himself. Are we HIS refreshment? Maybe not a need, but a desire. Is this our opportunity to shine in His eyes. Who'd want to miss that.
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Is it worth the sacrifice of deceiving momentary self service or apathy, that leads to all we don't want? That's an easy Spoken YES, but too often a Lived NO.
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God always sets before us life and death....cheers us on, "Choose LIFE!" Laziness kills life in us and those around us. Trustworthiness brings and renews life. We are contrasting our days in a personal journal chart these two extreme positions.
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What joy it is to know and to share that we don't have to be despondent when we look in ourselves and find garbage. God knows it's there and is just waiting for us to see it and agree with him that it's trash. It's GREAT news! You don't take trash out or burn it if you don't know it's trash or can't see it.
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So my question to all of you, " Are you going to see garbage for garbage? Are you going to call it something else? Are you going to ignore it and walk by? Or Are You going to see it for what it really is, and throw it OUT. Let the garbage truck come by and haul it off, take it where you won't pick it back up!" Burn it.
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Servant for LIFE. In the small everyday moments that define who we are, enabling the impossible to live in us.
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How many of us grew up answering the question, "What do you want to be when you grow up?"
SERVANT! It wasn't my answer but I am a new creation, it's my answer NOW!

Do You See What I See?

"Now the earth was formless and empty, darkness was over the surface of the deep, and the Spirit of God was hovering over the waters." Genesis 1:2

It isn't hard for me to believe, gazing at this majestic waterfall that God's Spirit is hovering. Standing there in the mist you feel it. It is as close to seeing His Spirit with my eye as I have been. All the mist swirling around me and the deafening thunder of the falling water. The tininess of me and the greatness of Him. It turns my heart to a deeper understanding of His limitlessness, His unstoppable force, His majestic beauty. In that moment nothing compares and nothing draws my attention from it. The only thing is the joy of standing in His presence, burning with desire to share this treasure, first with my loved ones, then with anyone who'll hear. He soaks my senses, filling me, blocking invaders inside and out, by his revealing might. Like Moses we can see His back. I know I could not live and see His front. I would be consumed. And that is the joy set before me. This joy, this unveiling, this exchange, this heart connection, this mountain top experience.....was found in the valley. Isn't that just like God. Walking down was a little scary as someone who with a great fear of falling. Walking back up was much harder for someone so out of shape, not used to such inclines. I like my life much flatter than God allows me to live. I praise Him for that. He woos me to come to Him. The Lover of my soul captivates me. He is with me as I walk. But when I walk with Him. Following His lead the journey may be bumpier, costlier and filled with multiple divers fears to overcome, it leads to the treasure of His Heart and the satisfaction of mine.

The Promise Keeper has given the sign of promise in water vapor. He is Faithful. He is Trust. It is a ring to wear. Breathe the mist, wear the ring, you are His.

"The voice of the LORD is over the waters; the God of glory thunders, the LORD thunders over the mighty waters." Psalm 29:3

"He waters the mountains from his upper chambers; the earth is satisfied by the fruit of his work." Psalm 104:13

"With joy you will draw water from the wells of salvation." Isaiah 12:3

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"They did not thirst when he led them through the deserts; he made water flow for them from the rock; he split the rock and water gushed out." Isaiah 48:21

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"During the fourth watch of the night Jesus went out to them, walking on the lake. When the disciples saw him walking on the lake, they were terrified. "It's a ghost," they said, and cried out in fear. But Jesus immediately said to them: "Take courage! It is I. Don't be afraid." "Lord, if it's you," Peter replied, "tell me to come to you on the water." "Come," he said." Matthew 14:25-29

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He is still walking on the water and calling me to come to Him. Not to be afraid, giving me courage as I step out in faith to walk on water. I will fall, yet He will save me. For me it is faith. But for Him it is who HE IS, the ONE who hovers above the water.

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"I tell you the truth, no one can enter the kingdom of God unless he is born of water and the Spirit." John 3:5

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"Whoever believes in me, as the Scripture has said, streams of living water will flow from within him." John 7:38

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"This is the one who came by water and blood - Jesus Christ. He did not come by water only, but by water and blood. And it is the Spirit who testifies, because the Spirit is the truth. For there are three that testify: the Spirit, the water and the blood; and the three are in agreement." 1 John 5:6-8

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"The Spirit and the bride say, "Come!" And let him who hears say, "Come!" Whoever is thirsty, let him come; and whoever wishes, let him take the free gift of the water of life." Revelation 22:17

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(I lost this post due to my computer skill. It caused me to be discouraged with blogging. Only today, after posting did I discover the gift of having it back. I hope you share my joy.)

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