WHAT a Gift of Love

Your love, LORD, reaches to the heavens, your faithfulness to the skies.
Psalm 36:5

Test me, LORD, and try me,
examine my heart and my mind;
for I have always been mindful of your unfailing love
and have lived in reliance on your faithfulness.
Psalm 26:2-3

How do you love for a season?
How can love exist in a limit?
How does love cost?
How is love defined?

Christ has called me to just that kind of love this year. To say I wanted to define the terms is an understatement. But to walk in His steps......

The love journey I am on is constantly stretching my heart to be more like Jesus. It cost Jesus everything to love. He sacrificed and limited himself by taking on a tent of flesh... for love. He endured all sorts of emotional pain in that life...for love. He willingly agreed to the pain of sacrifice for our sins...for love. Even now He has given us the ability to grieve Him....for love. In all moments he loves; regardless of circumstance or others or me. His decision to love, His choice, His Life was not a response to us. He is not who He IS by our actions; by mine, by others.  He is not who He is conditionally. HE IS who HE IS. He is THE Constant. The Rock. The Strong Tower.


But I will sing of your strength, in the morning I will sing of your love; for you are my fortress, my refuge in times of trouble.
Psalm 59:16


This is the lesson upon my heart this year. It's one I've known and tried to live....yet this year....TESTING came and came and came....The purification process was HOT! Why so much? Why so hot? Why so persistent?  The voice of LOVE, of TRUTH speaks to me, "This IS love. Infatuation is based on emotion. Worldly love is based on self interest and desire and coveting and reactions and circumstance and merit. Real Love is selfless, sacrificial, faithful, constant, and good; full of mercy, grace, forgiveness and hope; despite circumstance or merit or emotion. I love you, everyday, all the time, every time. I do not hesitate my love for you considering myself. I love completely and perfectly. Because I am LOVE, there is no other. Know me, know love. Give what you've been given. It's not yours to keep. It is mine to give. Love does not belong to you. It belongs to me."


Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love. This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him. This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins. Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us.
1 John 4:7-12



Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword?
Romans 8:35



You, LORD, are forgiving and good, abounding in love to all who call to you.
Psalm 86:5



Know therefore that the LORD your God is God; he is the faithful God, keeping his covenant of love to a thousand generations of those who love him and keep his commandments.
Deuteronomy 7:9


Love is completely void of self. So I ask myself, "How much do I love? Who do I love?" I am full of love for others. I understand love is defined by sacrifice. I know love is unaltered by circumstance. These are heart strings I've learned to play from past encounters with THE HOLY ONE.


Void of self......void. Me out of the thought process altogether. Void, as an adjective, is revealing:



1. Law. having no legal force or effect; not legally binding or enforceable.

2. useless; ineffectual; vain.

3. devoid; destitute (usually followed by of ): a life void of meaning.

4. without contents; empty.

5. without an incumbent, as an office.

6. Mathematics . (of a set) empty. 

7. (in cards) having no cards in a suit.

EXPAND

 LOVE gives up legal right, force or effect....the power of the LAW....the enforcement

LOVE gives up vanity and manipulation or use...planned effectiveness

LOVE gives up self purpose and meaning and security

LOVE gives up pride and protection to risk hurt and pain

LOVE gives up being in control

LOVE gives up laws of order and logic

LOVE gives up gives up privilege

LOVE gives up all the world's systems.... for another....

THAT is what JESUS did. He did it for me and calls me to do it for others.

For the least of these.

For the undeserving.

For the persecutors.

For the lost.

For.................whoever HE CALLS me to LOVE.

Actually He calls me to surrender so He can LOVE through me. I'm not love. He is.

Unless the LORD had given me help,

I would soon have dwelt in the silence of death;

When I said, "My foot is slipping,"

your unfailing love, LORD, supported me.

When anxiety was great within me,

your consolation brought me joy.

Psalm 94:17-19

 

 

 

Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves.

Romans 12:10

Follow God's example, therefore, as dearly loved children and walk in the way of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.

Ephesians 5:1-2

 

 

 

And so we know and rely on the love God has for us. God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in them. This is how love is made complete among us so that we will have confidence on the day of judgment: In this world we are like Jesus. There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love. We love because he first loved us. Whoever claims to love God yet hates a brother or sister is a liar. For whoever does not love their brother and sister, whom they have seen, cannot love God, whom they have not seen. And he has given us this command: Anyone who loves God must also love their brother and sister.

I John 4:16-21

In this season I've finally come to the gift of HIS LOVE in me. Not for me but in me. He desires to send me as a gift of love to those he loves. It's His LOVE that sustains me, comforts and heals me. His LOVE that sends me hope and fills me with joy..... WHAT a gift of love. My arms fling wide to His embrace of love, unconditional by me, faithful and true by Him. That same love can flow through me to others. Love has never begun with me. How foolish my thoughts have been to think it ever did. Freedom to love spreads it's fingers over the most recent strings accross my heart playing a greatful Love Song.

 

 

 

It is good to praise the LORD

and make music to your name, O Most High,

proclaiming your love in the morning

and your faithfulness at night,

to the music of the ten-stringed lyre

and the melody of the harp.

Psalm 92:1-3

 

 

 

Because your love is better than life, my lips will glorify you.

Psalm 63:3

I needed that kind of love today. And the LORD Jesus showed up with His LOVE and Lived in and through me! Oh, how I love Jesus.....because He first loved me!

 

 

 

A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.

John 13:34-35

 

 

 

Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.

1 Peter 4:8

 

 

 

When I release the LOVE, the LORD LOVES me with, to others, it is the LORD HIMSELF I have LOVED. Completing the circle ring of our engagement. If no one recieves it, if I am hurt, if I am rejected by the world....I am not by JESUS. HE is the lover of my soul and in those moments I am the lover of HIS. For you Jesus. Because I love you and I know that every time the circumstance is against me, you are for me and recieve my love.

 

 

 

Though you have not seen him, you love him; and even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy..

1 Peter 1:8

 

 

 

Show me the wonders of your great love, you who save by your right hand those who take refuge in you from their foes.

Psalm 17:7

 

 

 

Surely your goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the LORD forever.

Psalm 23:6

 

 

 

Praise be to the LORD, for he showed me the wonders of his love when I was in a city under siege.

Psalm31:21

 

 

 

For great is his love toward us, and the faithfulness of the LORD endures forever. Praise the LORD.

Psalm 117:2

 

 

 

May the LORD direct your hearts into God's love and Christ's perseverance.

2 Thessalonians 3:5

 

 

 

Mercy, peace and love be yours in abundance.

Jude 1:2

Quiet! Be Still!

Quiet! Be still!

Quiet! Be still!

Quiet! Be still!

He got up, rebuked the wind and said to the waves,

"Quiet! Be still!"

Then the wind died down and it was completely calm.

Mark 4:39

Why is it so hard for me? Why can I not hear? Why does my heart get lost in the storm?

Why can I not remember the LORD of Creation who has ALL AUTHORITY?

Why do my problems, challenges, and emotions appear stronger than they are?

Why do I harbor false beliefs?

Why do I loose faith in trials?

Why?

HE REMEMBERS

As a father has compassion on his children,

so the LORD has compassion on those who fear him;

for he knows how we are formed,

he remembers that we are dust.

The life of mortals is like grass,

they flourish like a flower of the field;

the wind blows over it and it is gone,

and its place remembers it no more.

But from everlasting to everlasting

the LORD's love is with those who fear him,

and his righteousness with their children's children-

with those who keep his covenant

and remember to obey his precepts.

The LORD has established his throne in heaven,

and his kingdom rules over all.

Psalm103:13-19

Why?

Because I am just me and no more.

I am limited.

I am just me.

Empty.

I am not able to be more.

AND the LORD knows it.

He Created me.

He Loves me.

He is Holy.

There is no mistake.

Did he created me this way.

This limited way.

This weak way.

This way.

To Create the Altar in me for His Presence to Dwell.

Did He created me to be His tent of meeting?

Nothing in itself until filled.

The tent.

The Tabernacle.

Completely empty,

meaningless,

and

void

without

HIS

PRESENCE.

Is the reason for my struggle of faith for just that purpose?

Glory!

Will a pillar of fire

by night

and

a pillar of clouds

by day

be my guide?

Glory!

Will the Mercy Seat

be set in my heart

for myself

and others?

Is this the reason to give the sacrifice of praise:

Praise in the storms

Praise in the problems

Praise in the challenges

Praise in the emotions

My God IS with me.

He calls me to be still and remember:

The LORD will fight for me: I need only to be still.

Exodus 14:14

The Levites calmed all the people, saying,

"Be still, for this is a holy day.

Do not grieve."

Nehemiah 8:11

Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him; do not fret when people succeed in their ways, when they carry out their wicked schemes.

Psalm 37:7

He says, "Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations,

I will be exalted in the earth."

Psalm 46:10

Be still before the LORD, all mankind,

because he has roused himself from his holy dwelling."

Zachariah 2:13

http://www.eternalcog.org/ecgtw/animman.html

Bouquet of Blossoms

I had the best time Saturday! I rode in the church van with wonderful ladies to a Christian Women's Conference.....including a Casting Crowns Concert!

One of my friends, someone I'd really like to get to know better, told me I need to get out more. AND she is RIGHT!!!! Some of the isolation is really good and some is not. Life is just so busy sometimes I forget girlfriend fun or it just doesn't make the LIST. Fellowship does happen in my life. THANK YOU JESUS. My heart would like a bit more. So caught up in responsibilities focusing with tunnel vision.....

Thank you Jesus for sending me the bouquet of blossoms you call daughters.

As followers of Christ, our time is not our own. As wives and mothers our time is not our own. As employees our time is not our own. It seems something is always a priority...it usually is. But not always. There always seems to be enough time to watch a favorite show or sit at the computer or complain about something.

Younger I believe I was a good friend. What happened? The LORD calls us to fellowship! Maybe I don't have much time, maybe there isn't anything during this season of life to squeeze out to make room. Yet there IS the ability to take notice and engage in the moments gifted. There is time to block and save if only rarely.

I started to rethink my girlfriend time and I realized I have more than I thought. Ladies Bible study is the most special. (I am having some withdraw and mourning over following Jesus to another study group) Secondly and similarly is our homeschool co-op. Without each of these groups of ladies I would feel cut off.  More, you bet I'd like. But I do have what I need. Each of these women are gifts.

The next time you extend the heart of friendship, remember you are causing another flower to blossom. Seasons of refreshment.  I've had times that I felt so alone in the battle...I don't anymore. Mostly due to girlfriends of faith.

I can't help but consider the flowers on the Lamp Stand in the Tabernacle.

Make a Lampstand of pure, hammered gold. Make the entire Lampstand and its decorations of one piece-the base, center stem, lamp cups, buds, and petals. Make it with six branches going out from the center stem, three on each side. Each of the six branches will have three lamp cups shaped like almond blossoms, complete with buds and petals. Craft the center stem of the Lampstand with four lamp cups shaped like almond blossoms, complete with buds and petals. There will also be an almond bud beneath each pair of branches where the six branches extend from the center stem. The almond buds and branches must all be of one piece with the center stem, and they must be hammered from pure gold. Then make the seven lamps for the lampstand, and set them so they reflect their light forward. The lamp snuffers and trays must also be made of pure gold. You will need seventy-five pounds of pure gold for the lampstand and its accessories.


Be sure that you make everything according to the pattern I have shown you here on the mountain.
Exodus 25:31-40

Jesus is the Lampstand....we are flowers, His bouquet, hammered into beauty....with the oil of the Holy Spirit flowing through us! All made from one piece!

Glory!!!!! May His LIGHT, His GLORY, shine, reflect, give light in the us the almond flowers.
He is calling us to be complete with buds and petals! Must be one with the Center Piece, must be hammered from PURE GOLD. We are called to this kind of friendship...it's the pattern! Flowers Filled with His Spirit, one with Him and each other... there may be hammering in life and refining.......But ooohhh the LIGHT.....it's then we behold HIS GLORY!!!!

I found a source that said:
Almond in Hebrew means "the awakening one", because the almond tree was the first to awake from the sleep of winter and blossom. It spoke of the speedy and powerful result of light.

Subpoenaed!

A subpoena was handed to me a few minutes ago. My hair was wet, evidence of a recent shower. Dogs barking and kids peering around me to get a view of the officer at the door. There is no planning a good time for the summons or negotiating it's dates. This was not convenient. Nor was the order.

I've been called upon to give testimony, to be a witness, to stand before the judge. Before others, some I would know and others I would not. Sounds like another call on my life. Give my testimony, be a witness, stand before HIM. Appointed meetings with others.

At first thought testimony sounds reasonable. Testimony is a legal form of evidence. It is sworn truth.
The Bible is THE TESTIMONY. It is divided into the Old and New Testaments. The TRUTH. The Evidence. Legal evidence. Upon these thoughts the idea of my personal testimony reveals its self. Truthful evidence in my life.  So where is the truthful evidence of Jesus in my life?  It's the stuff that is messy...Redeemed messy. Times God shows up whem I'm down for whatever reason. The times I call from the pit. All the times I know Jesus is REAL and my only hope, those are the pieces of my testimony. Not the easy comfortable no effort living times. Those are good times of rest. Or are they times we look back and see He was carrying us, cutting the path, fighting for us, binding our wounds, cherishing us.  More testimony.

James 2:14-26 puts it well:

Faith and Deeds

  What good is it, my brothers and sisters, if someone claims to have faith but has no deeds? Can such faith save them?  Suppose a brother or a sister is without clothes and daily food.  If one of you says to them, “Go in peace; keep warm and well fed,” but does nothing about their physical needs, what good is it?  In the same way, faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead.
  But someone will say, “You have faith; I have deeds.”
Show me your faith without deeds, and I will show you my faith by my deeds.  You believe that there is one God. Good! Even the demons believe that—and shudder.
  You foolish person, do you want evidence that faith without deeds is useless?  Was not our father Abraham considered righteous for what he did when he offered his son Isaac on the altar?  You see that his faith and his actions were working together, and his faith was made complete by what he did.  And the scripture was fulfilled that says, “Abraham believed God, and it was credited to him as righteousness,” and he was called God’s friend.  You see that a person is considered righteous by what they do and not by faith alone.
  In the same way, was not even Rahab the prostitute considered righteous for what she did when she gave lodging to the spies and sent them off in a different direction?  As the body without the spirit is dead, so faith without deeds is dead.

GOD is looking for EVIDENCE!

A witness is someone who has firsthand knowledge. Which begs the question, "What is my first hand knowledge?" God has called me, subpoenaed me to share not only His testimony but my first hand knowledge of Him. Yes, quote the scriptures. But more than that, share, declare the Living God IN my life. If I am not sold out it was HIM, I cannot give real personal testimony, I cannot be a witness. I have nothing to share...just regurgitation of what I've been told. Give information. "In theory" witness. What kind of truth is that? NOT truth at all.

Is the piece of paper delivered to me more serious and receive more of my effort than my call, subpoena, to the KING and LORD of All of Creation? Sadly.....my first thoughts are....I gotta make time and change my schedule for that week. IT has become a priority, no, THE priority. YIKES! I'm giving priority to an earthly authority beyond what I give THE LORD at times. I realize there is no room for a pity party or complaining. I accept the earthly law's authority and adjust. WHY do I not do this with Jesus. Ok, I'm not that much of a problem witness all the time. Just when my emotions aren't lined up or I've met my quota, or am tired, or just want something else. So I am a good witness when it costs me nothing and it's easy...... that even sounds horrid to me.
Because God loves me...I am so spoiled..... I must really stink up His nostrils sometimes.

There is something He's called me to lately. More like the Holy Spirit is calling me on the carpet. And spoiled girl that I am.......I won't just accept His authority and adjust my heart, mind and life. I want to, but I want to not make the sacrifices involved. I'm in contempt of court! Jesus keeps bailing me out and advocating for me. OH How I love JESUS!

Everyday I stand before His Throne, In His Presence.

We are called. We are subpoenaed!

Matthew 10:18-20

On my account you will be brought before governors and kings as witnesses to them and to the Gentiles.  But when they arrest you, do not worry about what to say or how to say it. At that time you will be given what to say,  for it will not be you speaking, but the Spirit of your Father speaking through you.

Mark 13:10-11

And the gospel must first be preached to all nations.  Whenever you are arrested and brought to trial, do not worry beforehand about what to say. Just say whatever is given you at the time, for it is not you speaking, but the Holy Spirit.

When I am deaf I cannot speak well. When I am deaf I cannot hear the questions. I cannot testify. I cannot be a witness. Evidence is lost and forgotten. In my deafness, isolation grips life, strangling my mind.  The Good News is under gag order.

Jesus, my Savior is so much bigger than my frail existence. He can open my ears and create a beautiful testimony of Himself.  So many ways He continually reveal Himself in my life so that I WILL KNOW HE IS GOD!

Acts 9:10
In Damascus there was a disciple named Ananias. The Lord called to him in a vision, “Ananias!” “Yes, Lord,” he answered.

I pray to have faith like Ananias, "Yes, LORD!" Subpoenaed by the KING to rock my world with His Spirit. Give me that heart Jesus. Give me THAT kind of desire. Give me sight. Give me hearing.

John 1:6-8

There was a man sent from God whose name was John.  He came as a witness to testify concerning that light, so that through him all might believe.  He himself was not the light; he came only as a witness to the light.

Called as a witness to testify
Called as a witness to the light
Subpoenaed!

Foolish one

Foolish one, what you sow is not made alive unless it dies.     I Corinthians 15:36

As many other stumbling women of God look into the mirror of Holiness and see a foolish one staring back at them, so at times, it is with me. An honest assessment, is called for, in order to grow in the grace of following Him. How often I'm found to be a foolish one. A foolish woman.

At each step of development in my life, death, of some sort, is experienced. Ironically, death isn't complete at once. Our understanding, our flesh experience with death, is complete and finial. This view inhibits our embracing of Resurrection Truth and holds us back from dying to self. Decaying woman brings with her the pull of flesh through sin. We desperately hold on to life and fear death. CHANGE itself is overwhelming and stressful. Avoidance is escape. Godly change is not exempt. I cling to my desires, understandings and plans. The crown I wear is one that rusts, rots, and can be stolen. Fear, emotions and intellect rule action, voice and thoughts. Setting goals, making plans and driving purpose. Either to gain or to depress. Pride or dispare. Both extremes are life in the flesh. Not a buried past.

Foolish one, what you sow is not made alive unless it dies. 
  I Corinthians 15:36

 The fear of death played out in this world keeps me from surrender. It keeps me in the illusion of control. Don't miss understand....much has been surrendered and death has occurred. It's just there is more found to kill, lay to rest, leave, scorn, cut off.  As my hand goes to pick the crown I'll wear TODAY in the battles of my life, waged in the corners of the soul, the question needs asked. Dead? A mirror check is needed. Surprise may register and I see the Resurrected New Life or surprise may speed my pulse at the vision of roting flesh. The rot and decay I keep holding on to expecting different results. (Rotting flesh produces rotten fruit.) One is beautiful the other quite ugly. And ugly has no alibi!

Christians have nothing to fear in death. And I don't. I struggle with fearing pain and suffering, at times the process.  But to be dead from this world holds no fear. My hope is in the LORD and I believe His Promises.

But, in my foolishness, this is a BIG BUT, I do have fear of death in this world. The proof is all over my life. Holding on to anything other than life with Jesus RIGHT NOW. When conflict arises, when dreams are shattered, when called on to suffer, submit or sacrifice....obey without understanding, without seeing hope... Simply, in those moments or seasons, my thoughts are my OWN and not CHRIST's. A battle is waged in my soul or victory is claimed at the on set. Too often, victory is claimed and it's not the LORD's. I'm found alive and kicking in the flesh. Not dead, at all. More lacking trust and faith in His Destiny for me. Finding myself buried yet not dead. Baptized yet not dead. Missing out on the Resurrected Life.

Not made alive unless it dies..... How wonderful the LORD Jesus is illustrating this truth in creation. He says all creation testifies! I want desperately to be ALIVE in HIM.... so I'll die a little more today. I'll think it's done until the mirror of His Word, through the Holy Spirit reveals what's been left in the flesh.

I think about cleaning out all the leavening from the home. Such does teach to look for hidden sin, hidden life of flesh. The pieces left alive, disguised, smuggled in, under another name, twisted truth, a derivative. The enemy is crafty. 

The list in my life is growing, Praise Jesus, of the things I am dead to. I am entering a period of mourning. I like or am very comfortable with parts of me that are called to die. But they DO NOT compare to the JOY SET BEFORE ME!
Help me Jesus, fill me with Your Holy Spirit to be able to throw off everything that hinders and entangles. Give me your perseverance, fix my the eyes on YOU. Show me the JOY. Help me scorn the shame of the cross to die to self.  Alive, able to cast beautiful crowns at Your Throne. Help me not grow weary or lose heart by remembering WHO YOU ARE and how blessed I am.

Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.
Hebrews 12:1-3

Very truly I tell you, unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains only a single seed. But if it dies, it produces many seeds. Anyone who loves their life will lose it, while anyone who hates their life in this world will keep it for eternal life. Whoever serves me must follow me; and where I am, my servant also will be. My Father will honor the one who serves me.

John 12:24-26

TRUTH sets us free! Power is in HIS SPIRIT! It's all because of Jesus I'm alive. It's all because the blood of Jesus Christ. ...That covers me and raises this dead WOMAN's LIFE!

GLORY to GOD!


All Because Of Jesus lyrics
Giver of every breath I breathe
Author of all eternity
Giver of every perfect thing
To You be the glory
Maker of Heaven and of Earth
No one can comprehend Your worth
King over all the universe
To You be the glory

And I am alive because I'm alive in You

It's all because of Jesus I'm alive
It's all because the blood of Jesus Christ
That covers me and raised this dead man's life
It's all because of Jesus I'm alive
I'm alive, I'm alive

Giver of every breath I breathe
Author of all eternity
Giver of every perfect thing
To You be the glory
Maker of Heaven and of Earth
No one can comprehend Your worth
King over all the universe
To You be the glory

And I am alive because I'm alive in You

It's all because of Jesus I'm alive
It's all because the blood of Jesus Christ
That covers me and raised this dead man's life
It's all because of Jesus

Every sunrise sings Your praise
The universe cries out Your praise
I'm singing freedom all my days
Now that I'm alive

I'm alive, I'm alive, I'm alive


[ From : http://www.elyrics.net/read/c/casting-crowns-lyrics/all-because-of-jesus-lyrics.html ]

Call to Four Step

All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the servant of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.
2 Timothy 3:16-17




First the phrase, "All Scripture", means all of it.

I have considered it often regarding the children. And somewhat less with myself in a basic way. It is easy to get large concepts and accept the precepts. As I set my mind and heart to meditation, revelation springs. Visions of the Bible being a Headmaster of sorts, instructing me. At first thought, what a blessing, a teacher, eager to teach ME! BUT then....I remember the best teachers of my past. Everyone of them stretched, challenged and confronted me. Quite demanding actually. At times learning was the last thing I wanted to do.......just finish it, avoid it, skim by, or skip it! There always existed crowds of complainers and those demanding compromise and change...whiners and manipulators. Sometimes I was in their number. These teachers often had fierce reputations accompanying mottos and moans following the sound of their names. But I learned, and learn to respect them...even learned to enjoy the subject...or at least appreciate it. Teaching is active with the teacher. The greatest effort and responsibility are with the teacher. The student is putting in their time and might hope to get something out of it, or might not. The student may have other reasons for the course than application. Knowledge can be gained yet wisdom and discretion may not. Head knowledge is most often gained before heart knowledge. Teaching is at times gentle. And a blessed teacher bates many hooks.

Good teachers wanted us to get it all. The math teachers didn't want, wouldn't allow, you to take multiplication out of the subject and the order of operations was not something they would compromise on. All of it. We couldn't pick and choose. God Breathed all of it.....it's all for teaching us....me. *sigh* As with math, the Word contains much we don't understand the "why" of what we need it for. It is just simply beyond our understanding. Learning to respect, accept and trust The ONE making the lesson plans defines what faith is. The element of trust cannot be removed from faith. It cannot exisit without it. It is very hard to practice faith without knowing what it is.

AS if THAT is not strong enough.........REBUKING!? Who wants THAT? Is that when my face glosses over as my brain scrambles to find the file of blame, excuse, justification or exemption! We know rebuking is not going to be pleasant. Teaching could be. After all there are classes we like, but not rebuking...it's gonna hurt and the rebuker isn't gonna let up until we get it. So with each file comes harder hitting rebukes...*ow* Stubbornness sores in my flesh.....confrontation and adrenaline prepare for countering each on coming rebuke. Defenses up, learning shut down. Heart hardens, bitterness stews, anger flares. After personal exhaustion and Truth, full of inexhaustible strength, remain standing dishing out endless rebukes......finally hitting the mark in my heart........to cut something out. Too tired to fight it with no files left to fight with....acceptance is calming, providing relief. Wisdom is gained and savored. Hard won? Or the product of a Faithful Rebuker? He loves us, that much. He will rebuke. He is able. Rebuke? Rescue? Restore? Redeem?

Now correcting is a bit clearer and more well received. (Especially following a rebuke war) Not that it is comfortable. It just doesn't confront motives or false beliefs. Lies we live by need to be rebuked. They need called out, cut out, burned out! Correction starts with an agreement in place of what is right and what is wrong. Who is God and who is not. The wound to cut doesn't have to go as deep. It doesn't require life support or heroic measures. More of a reminder with a paddle or time-out to sink in the memory enough to make self corrections. The use of self-control and the desire to have self government. Creating the steps in us to not only call on the Holy Spirit for empowerment but fans the flame of desire, serving HIM with our lives. To choose His will over ours. Abundant Life. A Life worth living.

Training is something we will stand in line to sign up for. Eager with excitement and anticipation. We want it. Well, we want the training we want. We want to use the training we get the way we want to. So control is the issue here. The Lord has our training prepared already. It may or may not be what we signed up for. Or what we thought it was gonna be like. Training requires dedication and perseverance. Knowing the goal and gaining on it. Training is discipline. Being disciplined. Allowing Him to come along beside us and speak every step of the way. There is no training without a daily relationship where we seek understanding and step out in faith. Risk takes place testing our training. We learn purpose in training. All the preparation is for use. Go. Do. Train to train. Be discipled to disciple. Keep near to Jesus, train to walk on water and fish for men.

Teach, Rebuke, Correct, and Train. Four steps to being equipped. All of them are needed. All scripture is God Breathed! These three steps of righteousness can't be skipped, each gift us with what is needed to fulfill our destiny in Christ! I want that. Lord, don't give up on me.....Teach me. When I need it, rebuke. Show me correction. Train me the way I should go.

After this, the word of the LORD came to Abram in a vision: Do not be afraid, Abram. I am your shield, your very great reward. Genesis 15:1

As the rain and the snow

and do not return to it
without watering the earth
and making it bud and flourish,
so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater,
so is my word that goes out from my mouth:
It will not return to me empty,
but will accomplish what I desire
and achieve the purpose for which I sent it.
Isaiah 55:10-11

So he said to me, This is the word of the LORD to Zerubbabel: Not by might nor by power, but by my Spirit, says the LORD Almighty. Zechariah 4:6

Man shall not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God.
Matthew 4:4

Heaven and earth will pass away, but my words will never pass away. Mark 13:31

I am the Lord’s servant, Mary answered. May your word to me be fulfilled. Luke 1:38

They were amazed at his teaching, because his words had authority. Luke 4:32

Whoever is ashamed of me and my words, the Son of Man will be ashamed of them when he comes in his glory and in the glory of the Father and of the holy angels. Luke 9:26

Blessed rather are those who hear the word of God and obey it.” Luke 11:28

For I will give you words and wisdom that none of your adversaries will be able to resist or contradict. Luke 21:15

The Word Became Flesh

In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. He was with God in the beginning. Through him all things were made; without him nothing was made that has been made. In him was life, and that life was the light of all mankind. The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it. John 1:1-5

Denial

Like the poor pilgrim of John Bunyan's allegory, I have been carrying a burden. That burden is the knowledge of my denial of Christ. I am so like Peter. Zest for Christ. Denial in trials. Bitter tears in truth.

"You aren't one of this man's disciples too, are you?" she asked Peter.
He replied, "I am not."
John 18:17

Again, like Peter the denial was in my words and actions. Declaring loudly, "I am not." ....just as clear as if those had been my exact words. Meaning conveyed.  My heart didn't. My mind didn't. YET in focusing on me and my circumstance....I left the Counselor and fretted to boil. Battling the weak flesh gate and not asking for the Holy Spirit to be strong in my weakness, my family witnessed what a Christ follower doesn't say or do. I praise my Jesus, THE MERCIFUL, for rescuing me from self justification and worldly standards. To the world it would be nothing, but to Christ disappointment and grief. I know Truth. It pains me. But TRUTH has the power of the CROSS. I am so unworthy of the call to follow in His Steps. Who am I, to disciple anyone? Can glory really be found in my flesh. Even in denial.

So they asked him, "You aren't one of his disciples too, are you?"
He denied it, saying, "I am not."
...."Didn't I see you with him in the garden?"
Again Peter denied it, and at that moment a rooster began to crow.
John 18:25-26

I think it did take three melt downs drowning in outbursts for me to hear the rooster crow this week. The first was brushed off my shoulders as mild and justified. The second was mended and a bit justified. The third time, my heart was crushed with conviction. I'm sure more sin was in my life this week, but God had His focus of surgery. He got out the Big Knife!

"Listen to me, you who pursue righteousness and who seek the LORD:
Look to the rock from which you were cut and to the quarry from which you were hewn:"
Isaiah 51:1


I believe denial takes many forms. Living Truth or not. Am I in agreement with the WORD? Is this what Jesus would do or say? Did I ask my Lord? Did I seek my Lord? Did I wait upon my Lord? Am I really following? Is any part of my life off limits to following? Do I reflect Jesus? Do I bring Him glory? Do I lift Him up drawing others to Him?

Ezra had committed himself to studying the Revelation of GOD, to living it, and to teaching Israel to live its truths and ways.
Ezra 7:10  The Message

"This is the crisis we're in: God-light streamed into the world, but men and women everywhere ran for the darkness. They went for the darkness they were not really interested in pleasing God. Everyone who makes a practice of doing evil, addicted to denial and illusion, hates God-light and won't come near it, fearing a painful exposure. But anyone working and living in truth and reality welcomes God-light so the work can be seen for the God-work it is."
John 3:19 The Message

It isn't just sin...It's to DENY the CHRIST. The Holy Spirit has made it easy for me to understand without all the static of feelings or rationalization interfering. Late as I am to seek Him. HE IS FAITHFUL to hear and bless me with understanding, offer peace, restoration and a little heart to heart with Himself, The Creator.

Psalm 85 The Message
God, you smiled on your good earth! You brought good times back to Jacob!
You lifted the cloud of guilt from your people,
     you put their sins far out of sight.
You took back your sin-provoked threats,
     you cooled your hot, righteous anger.
Help us again, God of our help;
     don't hold a grudge against us forever.
You aren't going to keep this up, are you?
     scowling and angry, year after year?
Why not help us make a fresh start-a resurrection life?
     Then your people will laugh and sing!
Show us how much you love us, GOD!
     Give us the salvation we need!

I can't wait to hear what he'll say.
     GOD's about to pronounce his people well,
The holy people he loves so much,
     so they'll never again live like fools.
See how close his salvation is to those who fear him?
     Our country is home base for Glory!

Love and Truth meet in the street,
     Right Living and Whole Living embrace and kiss!
Truth sprouts green from the ground,
     Right Living pours down from the skies!
Oh yes! GOD gives Goodness and Beauty;
     our land responds with Bounty and Blessing.
Right Living strides out before him,
     and clears a path for his passage.

What's Got Ta GO?

After two moves and now preparing for a garage sale I am constantly asking, "What's got ta go?" Such a simple question with emotional answers.

I would not have most of the stuff in my home unless I liked it or felt some kind of emotional need to keep or use it. There are many corners of my home with treasures brought to me by loved ones. There are many items I've collected myself. There are things that hold memories of my family. There are even some things that inspire dreams.

Now there is simply too much stuff in my home. I'm not a hoarder but there is clutter. Enough clutter to keep me from living the way I want to. We've settled in a blessed home that meets all our needs and is very comfortable. Our future has begun. And that is something to dance about!

A year and a half ago I sold everything I could part with at that time. We stuffed the remainder in a rental house and used the garage for storage. Who knew what our future home would be like? Now we know and it won't all fit. Ok....I have stuffed it in physically and packed in the garage. It's not quite the beauty I have envisioned this way. So. What's gottttaaaaa go???

Going from a large home with ABUNDANT storage to a home with a limited amount is an emotional brick wall. Just learning to think differently is a brain freeze. Storage has never been a real issue for me in the past, even with the school stuff!

I am pleased with my progress but it just ain't enough. Now the pain is setting in with questions like:

• Will I really know it's gone?
• Before leaving our previous home did I use it at least at holidays?
• Do I have something else to use?
• Do I need this many?
• How many guest will I really have in this house at a time?
• Does it need repaired?
• Do I have the same taste in this home as the last?
• Why am I keeping it? For me or someone else?
• Where am I gonna put it?
• How many projects do I have?
• Do I really need this to see or touch for keepsakes? How many?
• If I let it go will my dreams go with it?
• Is this blocking the future?
• Do I just love it?
• Does it make me smile? Do I need it to smile?
• Does it help me with accountability?

All that is before even touching the homeschooling stuff! Between the school stuff and pictures......it's tuff. What do the rest of you do with hoards of pictures and photo albums? I am so glad that many of the resent past pictures are electronic. Go Tech!

The BIG question the LORD is asking me in this season is, "Daughter, look in your heart...What's gotta go?" Ouch! He knows me so well, teaching me something externally to bring change internally. The sweeping away of stuff is not really material but emotional for me. So what is the emotional stuff hidden in the corners of my heart that I'm cherishing? That need to go? I discover His desire for me to be part of the process. Freewill offerings. All of my surroundings belong to Him. All of my heart belongs to Him. He could just command it, take it, even destroy it. He doesn't. He wants me to find it, ask the questions, flesh it out and offer it up. Freewill offering.

All the Israelite men and women who were willing brought to the LORD freewill offerings for all the work the LORD through Moses had commanded them to do. Exodus 35:29

My heart stuff could be really good stuff but in the way of what the LORD wants to do with me now. He is up to a new thing in me. I need to let go of.......what? It could be some trash I keep packing in my mind and drag with me everywhere. THAT sounds good to let go. Even a no brainer. Discerning between good stuff......aww that is hard and emotionally draining.

The LORD is my treasure. I can store all my memories in Him. All my dreams. All my projects!

Search me, God and know my heart;
test me and know my anxious thoughts.
Psalm 139:23

Search me and show me what's gotta go LORD. I know it's gonna hurt and I might even mourn a bit. I trust you to bless my efforts. Encourage me by not showing me more than I can bear at a time.

There's an opportune time to do things, a right time for everything on the earth:

A right time for birth and another for death,
A right time to plant and another to reap,
A right time to kill and another to heal,
A right time to destroy and another to construct,
A right time to cry and another to laugh,
A right time to lament and another to cheer,
A right time to make love and another to abstain,
A right time to embrace and another to part,
A right time to search and another to count your losses,
A right time to hold on and another to let go,
A right time to rip out and another to mend,
A right time to shut up and another to speak up,
A right time to love and another to hate,
A right time to wage war and another to make peace.

Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 The Message

It's the Right Time! It's God's appointed time for me. Just knowing the truth of that sets my heart to the tasks before me.

Jump Beloved

When Jesus heard him (her), he stopped and said, "Tell him (her) to come here."

So they called the blind man (woman). "Cheer up," they said. "Come on, he's calling you!" Bartimaeus threw aside his (her) coat, jumped up, and came to Jesus.

"What do you want me to do for you?" Jesus asked.

"My rabbi," the blind man (woman) said, "I want to see!"
Mark 10:49-51

I am so excited! The LORD is calling me. Calling me to jump! Bouncing images clutter all my thoughts creating  bubbles of youth in the aged fog of stale life. Who am I to say it's too late, it won't matter, it serves no purpose. The plate is served before me. Will I eat? YES! And it feels like rain refreshing my soul. Just knowing there is still life ahead. Adventure.

Until the time came to fulfill his dreams,
the LORD tested Joseph's character.
Psalm 105:19

The time for dreaming is not past. I love my life and feel blessed everyday. But it is a life laid out before me day in and day out. What is next. Is this all I've been called to? Most days I believe it is.....some days I'm not allowed to wonder if there could have been more. Surrounded by limits. Many questions of HOW???? Even Why?

He whispers in my heart, "Because I want to." He wants to? Well that settles is.

He has saved us and called us to a holy life - not because of anything we have done but because of his own purposed and grace. This grace was given in Christ Jesus before the beginning of time.
2 Timothy 1:9

Sure.... So will this be another round of sacrifice and discipline, a call to faith? That is just draining my energy. Wait, I know that voice..........

Get behind me Satan!

Could this be some of the joy set before me? Dare I hope?

He whispers again, "Let me fill your heart. Let me romance my beloved."

Wooooah. me? now? I need to clean up a bit first.

"Yeah, you do. Take off your past dreams and put on mine I've created for you."

"Do not come any closer," God said. "Take off your sandals, for the place where you are standing is holy ground."
Exodus 3:5

I have been stuck. Limiting possibilities by what I can see. By what I understand. So grown up and mature with loss of child like faith. Perhaps the child like face He wants to see on me is that of hope and delight in the future. Adoringly, Worshipfully looking to HIM, My Hero, My Love. A future where He makes the rules, where He is in control.  Where nothing is impossible for the LORD. And I can do all things in Christ.

This I say, therefore, and testify in the LORD, that you should no longer walk as the rest of the Gentiles walk, in the futility of their mind, having their understanding darkened, being alienated from the life of God, because of the ignorance that is in them, because of the blindness of their heart;
Ephesians 4:17-18

So what will I do with the gift of living the adventure? Will I make excuses? Will I stay focused on the past? Will I blame others for blocking or holding me back? Will I have faith? Will I say yes to what I don't completely understand, even if the prospect both scares and thrills me? Will I reject Him?

Will I trust JESUS enough to take His Hand and JUMP? I am looking at all the reasons it won't work or isn't practical or maybe even selfish. Is the enemy trying to put a stop to it? Am I gonna let him?

I am at peace. And that is HUGE! My God is ABLE. If this is His WILL, i am ready!!! I have no idea how it will all work out. The blessing of such a fit. ONLY Jesus knows me like that!

HE has had me in a strong season of servanthood and obedience and humility. He has looked me in the eye day after day calling truth in and out of my soul. I continue to wrestle with Him like Jacob....until He blesses me. Now with many limps.....perhaps I am ready. Now, aged and seasoned  like Moses...perhaps I am ready.  Now that I can't credit anything or anyone else...perhaps I am ready. How many time does He say, "and then you will know that I AM The LORD." Have I been brought through so much to know HE IS the LORD?

Maybe it isn't what I think it is. Maybe the gift is looking at tomorrow differently. Looking to Him with a child like faith. Maybe He is just teaching me to say yes without questioning with a ready, expectant life.

The children know there are three parts to obedience. No exceptions. You miss one part and you've disobeyed. First time. Completely. Attitude. Is this the lesson for me, again? It's just not whole with a part missing.

For merely listening to the law doesn't make us right with God. It is obeying the law that makes us right in his sight.
Romans 2:13

The child is not to question, argue or demand explanations prior to obeying. THIS is very hard. I am happy to explain at a different time. Or I may choose this as a teaching time. This takes faith on their part and trust in me or in the LORD.  It's very hard for me too. I really can't obey any better than my children if I don't choose to trust and know HE IS the LORD.

Again the LORD humbles Himself to this lowly flawed woman and beckons my hand, "Trust ME. I AM. Fear Not. Lean not on your own understanding. JUMP my darling!"

But you, beloved, building yourselves up on your most holy faith, praying in the Holy Spirit, keep yourselves in the love of God, looking for the mercy of our Lord Jesus Christ unto eternal life.
Jude 1:20-21

Carved To Beautify

Psalm 144:12b

...that our daughters may be as corner stones, polished after the similitude of a palace:  KJV

May our daughters be like graceful pillars, carved to beautify a palace. NLT

Our daughters will be like pillars that have been made to decorate a palace. NIrV

...our daughters as sculptured corner pillars hewn like those of a palace; AMP

Our daughters as shapely and bright as fields of wildflowers. MSG

My oldest daughter is at camp this week and I am missing her. She is truly a love of my life. In fact I was in love with her for years before her birth. I often wonder if the journey that brought us together, was for me to understand more deeply, how God loved me before I was born. After all I am believing Jesus died for me over 2000 years ago. And all those promises in His Word are for me. Did He really have me in mind? I know the right answer but do I know it to be life changing. Does it define who I am?

My daughter's identity is defined by who I am and my love for her. She is her own person, with her own responses. Yet it is my love, care and provision for her....both now and before she was born that gives her life choices and ability to live purposefully, with joy, with freedom, without fear. Without me....she would use up all her self to meet her needs and still not be able to meet them.

Do I use up all of myself trying to meet my needs and still not be able to meet them.  Sometimes. Do I forget who  I am? Do I forget how much Jesus the KING loves me. Father God. His Spirit.

Then I remember how my heart and life prepared the way for my daughter... and so rest in knowing, not only the possibility but the reality of God's unconditional love for me. A love that is so strong it was completely formed and solidified before my birth. Before my sin.

Response is all He desires. It's all I desire from my own daughter. I crave a long standing deep relationship with her. Not perfection. I want to be in her life. I want her to know me. I want to know her. I want to share life with her joys, sorrows, pain, victories, tears, concerns, worries, fears, hurts,celebrations, hugs, hopes, dreams and faith. I want the best for her. I am willing to sacrifice for her. My desire is to bless her. My love for her is unconditional. I miss her when she isn't around or any loss of communication. I want her to trust me. Trust my love for her. Love me. It really isn't difficult. Why do we make it more than that with the LORD? 

I rejoice that we are daughters of the KING. May HE continue polishing, carving, sculpting us into beauty. Carved to beautify. The graceful heart that needs to grow in me is to say thank you when I want to say OUCH! Carved to beautify ya know! That word carve scares me a bit. Blood and pain and loss begin to dance around in my head leaving only small amounts of space for contemplating what comes next. I can become so fixated on the now of being carved, I lose faith. Graceful Faith. The kind of faith that makes me beautiful. Carve away LORD. I'm ready though my eyes are squeezing shut! I am so glad you love me. May the LORD continue to raise me and help me join Him raising His Daughters that I am blesses with.

Graceful pillars of His Palace! Pillars are structurally important to the rest of the construction. We stand with The Corner Stone. In fact He is asking us to be as He is. (Be Holy because He IS Holy) He desires to see our beauty. He desires us with Him. And each other. He has loved us and shown us how to stand and be beautiful. He's been waiting for each of us for a very long time. Love secure. Faithful. Carved to Beautify.

Out Of The Water

She named him Moses, saying, "I drew him out of the water."
Exodus 2:10

What do others call you? What do you call yourself? Who are you really? Does the name fit? A little baby saved was called Out Of The Water. Are we called the same? Am I known as Out Of The Water?

I find the events of Moses' life with water sprinkled everywhere quite humorous. When the Israelites were complaining about a lack of water to Out Of The Water is especially ironic. That God would use Out Of The Water to lead His People through the water is another.

Did they grumble "Hey there Water (for short), where's the water? Water, we are thirsty? Water Boy!"

or

"OUT OF THE WATER, there is water blocking our escape! We are going to die! There is no hope OUT OF THE WATER, Out Of The Water!!!!"

How the Lord allows humor to penetrate my heart. How often my faith walk sounds just so to heavenly ears.


Jesus is the Living Water. Yet even he was baptised and scripture records the same Out Of The Water beginning HIS ministry. Out Of The Water is again with the Ethiopian's baptism leading him back to evangelise his homeland. Out Of The Water is a phrase we are familiar with. But have we lost it's meaning with just that familiarity?

As soon as Jesus was baptized, he went up out of the water. At that moment heaven was opened, and he saw the Spirit of God descending like a dove and alighting on him.
Matthew 3:16

Do we consider it a moment or a beginning. Do we consider it an action alone and not a naming. Is Out Of The Water the name we wear. Is it the name we answer to? Is it the name we sign to our words. Is it who we are?

Just as Jesus was coming up out of the water, he saw heaven being torn open and the Spirit descending on him like a dove.
Mark 1:10

When they came up out of the water, the Spirit of the Lord suddenly took Philip away, and the eunuch did not see him again, but went on his way rejoicing.
Acts 8:39

The next time I'm dealing with grumbling, I'm remembering Out Of The Water. Moses. Jesus. The Ethiopian. Salvation, Ministry, Evangelism. Just like Moses we are to be Out Of The Water everyday. Moses' name wasn't changed. For each of the main seasons of his life the name remained the same. The forty in Egypt, the forty as a shepherd, the forty leading Israel through the wilderness to the promised land. There was no escaping the name and calling. There was no limiting God's abilities. There was no hiding God's glory.

Harriet Tubman was known as the Moses of the South. Are you known as a Moses, as Out Of The Water? Am I?

I'm thinking folks referenced Noah as Out Of The Water. As I continue growing in scripture I am sure many more will surface as Out Of The Water! And go on my way rejoicing!